AI Engineers Preferred… OpenAI and Anthropic Top the List
Expectations for Stock Value After Going Public… Shared Values Also Matter

The number of Chinese-American women looking for husbands in Silicon Valley is growing. They are putting employees at AI companies preparing to go public at the top of their list of prospective spouses, ahead of traditionally high-paying jobs such as investment banking (IB) and engineering. Expectations that stock values could rise after an initial public offering (IPO) appear to be one factor driving the trend.

AI engineers top list of preferred spouses… OpenAI and Anthropic in the spotlight

The New York Post recently reported that Chinese-American women are traveling to Silicon Valley to meet men in the AI industry. Qinghua Zhao, founder of TwoRedBeans, the largest Chinese dating service in North America, said that while clients once looked for men living on the East or West Coast of the United States, they are now prioritizing AI engineers in Silicon Valley. Zhao named Anthropic and OpenAI as among the most sought-after companies.

Amy Yang, who runs the matchmaking service Matchmaker Amy in the San Francisco Bay Area, also said that more women are looking for people who work in the AI industry. Yang, a former tax analyst at Oracle, said women who have moved from other areas are looking for engineers as spouses and are particularly interested in the AI field. Some women travel to San Francisco from other areas every week to find a spouse. One client from Los Angeles (LA) even considered staying in San Francisco for six months because AI companies, including OpenAI, are based there.

Expectations for stock value after going public

These women consider the growth potential of AI companies an important factor in choosing a marriage partner. A Chinese businesswoman in her 40s, who had run a business in China and is preparing to settle in Silicon Valley with the son from her first marriage, spoke anonymously. “Marriage is now a process of restructuring my assets,” she said. “I have experienced firsthand what it’s like to be an ordinary salaried worker with nothing left after paying taxes. In a sense, I’m investing in the future prospects of men at AI companies preparing to go public, but since that also involves risk, I’m looking for someone whose future is clear.”

These expectations are fueled by the valuations of AI companies and reports of employees selling their shares. The outlet said Anthropic is pursuing an IPO in mid-November and could be valued at more than $2 trillion.

OpenAI is still privately held, but some current and former employees have already secured substantial sums by selling shares they own. In October 2025, more than 600 current and former employees sold about $6.6 billion worth of shares (about 8.8294 trillion won), with around 75 of them reportedly cashing out $30 million each (about 40.1 billion won).

Shared values and emotional connection also matter

Economic considerations are not the only priority for women. Su Zhong, a 34-year-old Chinese-American woman living in LA, consulted several matchmaking services to find someone who shared her values. She also looked into a package from Yang’s agency that costs $1,500 (about 2.2 million won) for three introductions.

Born in China, she moved to the United States at age 16, worked in her family’s marine fuel business, lived in New York, and moved to LA last year. Zhong said she was interested in AI founders seeking to change the world and found it appealing that she might meet people with similar values in Silicon Valley. However, she stressed that mental connection and mutual attraction mattered more than a prospective partner’s net worth or other qualifications.

Matchmakers use member databases and personal networks to find suitable partners for their clients. Zhao reviews TwoRedBeans members to identify potential matches, then asks acquaintances at major technology companies for recommendations. Yang also draws on her existing members, former clients, industry contacts, and the networks of other matchmakers.

However, meeting someone who meets these criteria is not easy. Technology workers often join companies straight after graduating, which limits their social circles, and they devote so much time to work that they have few opportunities to meet new people. Matchmakers said some are also unaccustomed to approaching strangers, so simply traveling to Silicon Valley does not guarantee a successful match.

Men also weigh education, career, and emotional connection

Choosing a spouse is not a one-way process. According to Yang, some successful men in the AI industry expect a prospective partner to have at least a bachelor’s degree and a stable job in the San Francisco Bay Area. They also want a partner with an independent social life and career.

Zhao said men in the technology industry may be comfortable solving problems logically but have had relatively few opportunities to learn emotional communication. She said that even if Silicon Valley workers have high intelligence quotients (IQs), they do not necessarily have high emotional intelligence (EQ), and that they want a partner who understands them and treats them warmly.

Zhao said expectations for a spouse can rise as financial success increases one’s net worth. She added that expectations about appearance may rise as well.

The outlet reported that while the growth of the AI industry and expectations for stock compensation are changing preferences in the marriage market, financial means alone do not determine who becomes a spouse. Multiple factors, including career, education, values, and emotional connection, are being considered together.

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